viernes, julio 06, 2007

Notas de un Hipocondriaco IV

Como decia mi padre: "La letra con sangre entra" , en esta particular situacion mi esposa entono el dicho : "la letra con miedo entra" y dejo la puerta abierta como para intimidar futuras situaciones que pudiesen revolver la mente ya en una etapa de gestacion horrorosa. La cita con el Dr fue hecha para un sabado por la manana. El galeno me explico que el modus operandi de la pequena extraccion o biopsia no demoraria mas de 1 hora y en si era algo tan facil de hacer que aquello se pareciera demasiado a una visita del dentista. -"Ok Dr me parece muy buena su comparacion pero...no se da cuenta Ud que yo le tengo panico a cualquier profresion que tenga como titulo Dr?"-. La carcada jocosa que hizo el Dr por culpa de mi mal llamado chiste me recordaba a su vez a una pelicula progatonizada por Jack Nicholson cuando hizo el papel del "Guason" en Batman. Sus mandibulas tan pronunciadas por cierto, parecidas a un juego mecanico atemorizador de alguna feria viajera en donde el trencito se encarrilaba a una entrada dentro de unos dientes gigantes y donde la felicidad de cualquier nino se perdia entre una humareda y una pesadilla horrorosa de nunca terminar.

Al llegar al consultorio del Dr mi corazon no paraba de latir, a esto se sumia todo mi sistema digestivo siendo la victima mas propensa el final del mismo. La operacion comenzo con la anestesia. Una aguja que no se si fue por el miedo parecia mas grande de lo que era, al ver semejante inyeccion mi primer intento de salir corriendo fueron terminadas cuando ya senti el dolor punzante dentro de mi boca y lentamente observaba como el dedo pulgar del doctor se apoyaba sobre el gatillo que paso a paso hacia que el liquido se regara y que paralizaba cualquier nervio facial alrededor de mis labios. Despues de tan dulce masoquismo y sin haber exclamado ni un "ay!" ya estaba listo para la segunda etapa. Los guantes de goma arropaban un par de tijeras largas y el momento que definia mi vida como hombre estaba a punto de comenzar. Observe por unos minutos como el Dr removia cierta carnosidad de mi boca... un pedacito, otro pedacito y otro pedacito; ya que toda mi mandibula estaba tan dormida, las unicas frases comprensibles comenzaban y terminaban con dos vocales-"Dooootoooo, dooootooo. Qeuue Quee uute ki e? kansheee?", "No" respondio el Dr, seguido por una pausa "No entiendo chino".

Despues de la operacion hubiese sido conveniente un invento como el tampon bucal. La cantidad de sangre derramada a traves de mi boca por razones de la biopsia, muy bien pudieron abastecer cualquier pelicula de freddy krugger durante un minuto de terror. Ningun tipo de gasa podia controlar el el exodus de globulos blancos y demas plaquetas hacia el exterior.

Despues de una semana donde sufri altibajos esperando por los resutados de la biopsia, recibi una llamada del Dr. En su representacion, la enfermera decidio conversar conmigo y me informo que las puebras demostraban que el extrano objeto que se encontraba en mi boca en si era un tumor pero era un tumor amigo o en terminos mas sofisticados: benigno. Mientras manejaba hacia mi hogar, el grito de alegria hubiese sido igual al de haberse ganado la loteria, no habia marcha atras, otra oportunidad estaba en mis manos y ya se podia divisar el horizonte. Se acabo el miedo, las locuras y los ataques de ansiedad que retrocedian cualquier esfuerzo mio al tratar de controlar mi bienestar mental. No soy muy religioso pero si doy gracias, a que? no lo se; a quien, peor todavia. Lo unico que se es que la vida continua aunque obstaculos se encuentren en tu frente, la vida continua. Mirando hacia atras y despues de analizar las reacciones tomadas tras analizar lo incurable, no cabe duda que la vida es un mecanismo complejo que es manejado por las manecillas del destino y el .......


P.S. Perdonen las faltas ortograficas.

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